Fight Like A Girl

I've directed Miss Iron County for the last 6 years or so.  I've supported the program because of its benefits to the girls while finishing school, for the service projects during the year, for the amazing women that I've had the pleasure of working with...and mostly, its a project for me.  Every mother needs a project of some sort.  Something that includes adult conversation and something that is yours to work on.  Miss Iron County was perfect because most of what I do can be done from my phone and/ or computer.  Aside from the pageant week and a few other things, I really don't have to be gone.  It was perfect.  But if I'm being honest...and this may surprise some, I detest the competition (pageant) aspect of this project.  I hate watching girls work so hard and walk away thinking that they did horrible and failed if they didn't win the whole thing, and really I don't like the "pageant" aspect of it.  I like how it teaches these girls hard work, service, better speaking skills, and enhances their talents but there are some things I hate about the "pageant" part.  I'll leave it at that.  I do however love how it teaches these girls to get involved in their community, to serve others and work hard at improving the aspects related to their platform.  The girls that win are typically independant and responsible, I help when asked and where I'm needed, but I typically don't get too involved beyond some leg work. 

Crystal is my current MIC and she has run for the title the past 3 years before finally taking the title.  Her uncle was diagnosed and passed away a few years ago which got her involved in Cancer awareness which inevitably introduced her to a little girl named Chase who had come up with an ingenius product called "Hats N Hair."  Chase learned first hand how statistics show that pediatric cancer patients are more afraid of losing their hair than their own mortality fighting this disease.  So she made these darling clips of real hair that clip to the back of ball caps, so when they go out they can hurry and throw on these ball caps and feel somewhat normal again in public.  Crystal had spent a lot of time and volunteered along with Chase making these hats and it doesn't take long talking with Crystal to know where her heart is.  After each new girl is crowned, I always sit down with them and discuss what they should plan on for that year, things to look forward to and be aware of, and mostly we talk about where they want to focus their service towards.  We have walked away with the best service in the community award twice at Miss Utah, which is out of the 50 + girls that they're competing with and its important to me that we keep that standard up.  I personally don't care so much how they place at Miss Utah, (although they do well), as much as  I care about is their service in their community.  Its what is going to matter in the long run, what will teach them the most.  So when Crystal, Crystal's mom Christa, and I sat down just a few days after she won we discussed the different possibilities.  She knew she wanted to do more with pediatric cancer, so we started tossing ideas.  I told her that she could piggy back with state and/ or national groups that do just that, or if she was willing and able...start her own, do her own fundraiser.  She didn't hesitate.

Back when we were in the Mesa Hills ward, the bishop's son John was fighting to live.  After watching what their family went through I've always wondered why the efforts, fundraising, support don't usually include the family as a whole...even though theres not a single person on the planet that if given the choice to trade places with either the child (patient) or the parent would choose the parent.  There cannot be anything harder than watching your child suffer, or being a sibling usually too young to understand why their needs are pushed aside and mom and/ or dad is always gone.  Its traumatizing, yet they typically aren't focused on.  Because of that experience, I told Crystal that if it were me...I would focus on the family as a whole, not just he child.  She loved the idea and we went to work. 

I think that its easyto want to keep situations like children having cancer out of sight, out of mind.  You would never want to imagine anyone suffering through chemo and all the other things that are associated with cancer, let alone a child, it just breaks your heart.  I think that because of that we disassociate ourselves, unless personally forced to know, how it feels for them, for their parents, family, and close friends going through that.  I should have known better than to think I would be able to not get emotionally involved.  I was at the Lion's club with Crystal, and she was telling me that she had taken gift packages to these kids and their families around halloween.  She told me about how she sat with Avery (5) while she threw up in a bag and doing her blood transfusions for 7 hours. 

While we were waiting for the meeting to start, we talked about what we were working on for the fundraiser/ benefit concert and I asked her to make a list of all the pediatric cancer patients in our community.  She listed 4 girls.....thats when I got invested.  I said, "Crystal!  They're all girls?!  There's SOOO many things we can do with that!"  I told her we can do princess parties with tiaras, dresses, princess characters......"  We both got SOOOO excited!  Since it was happening so fast, we needed to get support and sponsors soon so that we knew where we were and what we could work with.  I knew that we needed to draft up a letter to send out and take to potential sponsors and it needed a name, we needed something to call this benefit.  We knew we were going to do just a concert, but we needed a name.  We needed to get the letters out within days, so I said...ok you think on it and I'll think on it, and we'll decide on a name by tomorrow.  We bounced around generic acronyms that basically associated with families with pediatric cancer patients, but nothing clicked.  I have the WORST insomnia, especially when I can't turn my brain off working on something like this, and it sucks BUT its when you can do the best brainstorming.  I was running through my mind the things we would do during the concert and I was thinking about putting together a slideshow while Crystal danced, she is a beautiful dancer, and I was thinking we should just do the song she danced to when she won MIC...And I thought of the song and I literally sat up in bed, the song was called "Fight Like A Girl."  It was catchy, it was perfect!  I was so mad that I was the only one awake, and poor Crystal got an EARLY wake up call at 6 am because I just couldn't stand it.  I said, "Crystal!  We're both morons!  We've been bouncing around the wrong names...FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!!! FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!!!  Its perfect!"  She of course loved it.

Angela Eyre, my pageant buddy and close friend, taught me the art of taking business cards and designing them to look like tickets....loads cheaper than making actual tickets.  So I got them ordered and when I was checking out, it asked if for X amount of dollars I could get a t-shirt with the "Fight Like A Girl" logo on it.  I thought, "oh too bad these aren't cute...otherwise I'd buy them!"  Then I thought, "WAIT!  We can make our own!"  I figured I'd order about 100 to sell at the benefit and maybe earn a few more dollars.  So I took a chance and ordered them.  They came the weekend Jim and I were leaving for Vegas, so I called Crystal and told her if she wanted to go all the way to Parowan and get them, she could have them in time for the SUU Gymnastics meet where they were letting Avery be an honorary team member. 

After that, we couldn't keep them...whether people were buying them in support of the cause or it was catchy, they were flying faster than I had expected...I had to reorder them 4 times, each time a bigger order.  We added bracelets and car decals to our product list...

At first when this thing started, I had to pursue local sponsors just to pull this thing off...don't get me wrong most of them didn't even wait for me to actually ask before they hopped on board but since this was so new and no one had heard of it I had to pursue them. Then it was so amazing...whether from the shirts, posters, and whatever else.... people started hearing about it and started emailing and contacting US.  People were donating services, money, products, and anything else they could.  It was absolutely inspiring.  I don't think I have ever been so excited for something than I was for the Princess Party/ Benefit.  It was all I could think about.  I had called Renita (State Director) and asked where she got the trademark crowns that MIC has, she gave me the number and I ordered 4 mini identical crowns, just like Crystal's.  Crystal and I rounded up dresses to gussy them up in and we tracked down the number to the lady that has princess character costumes.  We called Mo, Erika, and Crystal's friend Kylie to be our princess.'  I had gotten my kids a kinect game "disneyland" for Christmas (which is so cool by the way, it is an identical replica of Disneyland and you walk through going on different rides and talking to the disney characters), and in it, theres a princess game where they teach you to dance like them :)  We were SOOOO excited. 

If you know me, I am not a crafty person.  We knew we wanted to make these packages and gift bags for both the girls and their family, and it was all fun and games to make them until it was time to MAKE them.  I was hoping Crystal was crafty.....shes not either.  It took some doin!

The day of the benefit came and we were ready!  And apparently I'm super animated when I'm a princess...nice

 We painted their fingers and toes, made candy tubes and bracelets, a professional face painter came and colored their faces...

The princess game with Avery....

That morning I got a text from one of the mothers, Hallie (5) ended up in the ER that morning with a fever and was devastated....so, we took the party to her :)

The concert was that night and we got all set up and ready.  Michael talked to me about the legistics of doing a fundraiser and we were talking about what our goal was. Then about a month before the benefit, Crystal heard of a teenage boy that had been diagnosed with Cancer.  About half way through this process I knew that I wanted to do this every year, so I created the Fight Like A Girl company so that we could continue supporting any pediatric patience, girl or boy.  We weren't sure how he would feel about being included in such a girly event, but I'm sure when you're struggling, support and money is appreciated even if it comes from a girly source.  So I tracked down the parents and told them that if there was enough, and if the other families were ok with it....we'd include them in the proceeds, but that he for sure would be included in anything past this benefit.  They were grateful and weren't expecting anything.  Crystal's family showed up, siblings, grandparents, cousins, and all.  They were...are amazing.  Crystal's cousin Kenzie made a quilt to raffle, her siblings helped sell products, her grandma stood beside the quilts we had made for the girls, her dad had shirts at his store....they were indespensible.  And can I just tell you about her mom Christa??  That woman is amazing.  Helped make the bags, set up the foyer, and anything else that was needed...  I think we would've died without them.  I had asked Jayme to come sit backstage, I was so nervous about all the little dance groups and kids that would be backstage, and without having time to do a full run through it had the potential of being chaotic to say the least.  She didn't even hesitate and it was beyond helpful to have her there. 

Granny's quilts made and donated 4 quilts for the girls, everyone that came signed a message on them...

The original idea for the concert was to have the past MIC's come perform, since one of them is the mother of the boy I mentioned earlier, Johnny Pearson, I knew that we had to do something with it.  So in the middle, we did a slideshow of his ordeal with pictures and statistics of all that he and his family went through...there were people that came up to me after and said that after seeing the list of what he survived they expected to see something like the date when he passed away..but then when they saw him walk out with Mary, they gave him a standing ovation...it was kind of amazing.  When I get a chance I'll post the video....it was awesome. It was one of my highlights of the night.  Its such an incredible story.

We asked Christa Cardon (Crystal's mom) to total it all up during the concert so we had an idea of how we had done and what we had to give.  3 quarters through, she handed me a slip of paper.  $1,211.00.  I was a little disappointed, twelve hundred split 5 ways wasn't going to go very far.  Then I saw the tears in her eyes....that wasn't the total amount, that was the amount that we had to give EACH family.  I cried.  I don't think I have ever felt something that amazing before.  After we paid for the facility, the crowns, the princess party, the packages, the gift cards, prepaid visa cards, t-shirts, products, and everything else...we still had $1,211.00 to give each family. 

I don't think I'll ever forget this experience.  I don't think I'll ever forget how amazing it was to watch this community rally around these families.  I don't think I'll ever take my kids' good health for granted.  I don't think I'll ever forget what amazing, strong, and incredible people these families are.  I think that I need to count my blessing a little more specifically and more detailed from now on :)

www.fightlikeagirl2.com